Prosecco N Prose | A Book Club
Prosecco N Prose is a monthly virtual book club where literary analysis meets liquid courage. Former English teachers Wendy and Amy sip Prosecco (or something of the like), spill opinions, and gleefully overanalyze the books you love (and love to hate). Expect deep dives, hot takes, tangents, and a healthy disregard for “assigned reading rules.” We talk books, book clubs, and whatever else pops up in the glass. Requests encouraged. Judgement not included.
Prosecco N Prose | A Book Club
John Chu - The Water That Falls On You From Nowhere
Use Left/Right to seek, Home/End to jump to start or end. Hold shift to jump forward or backward.
Wendy and Amy get to the truth of John Chu's thought-provoking short "The Water That Falls on You From Nowhere." Themes on lying, the symbology of water and rain, a fun game on American and Chinese holiday traditions, and a Pinocchio connection are all part of the discussion. Pop a cork to not getting caught in a lie!
“The Water That Falls on You from Nowhere”by John Chu
Introduction of Bubbly, Prose, and Podcast – 00:00:00
Catching Up | Ménage á Trois Tasting – 00:04:22
Author and Book Information – 00:10:32
Main Character Introduction – 00:13:36
Brief Summary with Spoilers – 00:14:27
Handful of Hyperbole
1) Themes of Truth and Lies – 00:19:25
2) Symbols – Water and Rain – 00:23:23
3) Voodoo Name Book – Matt and Gus 00:25:33
4) Game – Two Facts and a Fib (Chinese/American traditions) – 00:27: 23
5) Random – Escape Pod 459’s Pinocchio connection – 00:36: 19
Closing and Outro – 00:39:03
Link to Buzzsprout episodes for show notes.
Next Episode (Season Finale): The Invisible Life of Addie Larue by V. E. Schwab
Prosecco N Prose | Season 2 | Episode 19| “The Water That Falls on You from Nowhere” by John Chu
Co-Hosts: Wendy (W) | Amy (A)
March 3, 2021
Introduction of Bubbly, Prose, and Podcast – 00:00:00
Catching Up | Ménage á Trois Tasting – 00:04:22
Author and Book Information – 00:10:32
Main Character Introduction – 00:13:36
Brief Summary with Spoilers – 00:14:27
Handful of Hyperbole
1) Themes of Truth and Lies – 00:19:25
2) Symbols – Water and Rain – 00:23:23
3) Voodoo Name Book – Matt and Gus 00:25:33
4) Game – Two Facts and a Fib (Chinese/American traditions) – 00:27: 23
5) Random – Escape Pod 459’s Pinocchio connection – 00:36: 19
Closing and Outro – 00:39:03
Next Episode: The Invisible Life of Addie Larue by V.E. Schwab
00:00:00
Wendy (W): Welcome to Prosecco and Prose Episode 19.
Amy (A): This week’s prosecco is Ménage á Trois.
W: This week’s prose is the short story “The Water That Falls on You from Nowhere” by John Chu.
* * * intro * * *
00:00:44
A: Episode 19! Girl...Season 2 is winding down.
W: It is … only one episode left … kind of hard to believe. We’ve been getting some great reading requests for Season 3.
A: Really have and there’s still time to get yours in if there’s something you’re wanting us to discuss. Final decisions are fast approaching, so let us know soon. I’m really enjoying being pushed out of my reading comfort zone … Oh...and my personal prose challenge is also off to a great start.
W: That’s awesome and such a fun idea. Did you just come up with it based on your reading habits, was it something you saw, or a combo of both?
A: Saw various challenges at the beginning of the year on Insta and Facebook. None appealed to me. Some challenges had to do with the number of books one reads throughout the year. Do you realize some people read a book every other day? I'd never get anything accomplished. I read a book five and six times before it sees the shelf again.
W: I would say reading one book a day is quite an accomplishment, but even the books we don’t use for the podcast?
A: Well no of course not! The ones for the podcast are my OCD books that are read and reread and read again and again and again. Now my challenge list...that requires some deep research. Gunna check off one with our next novel, you know The...
W: Don’t tell them. Wait until the end of the episode.
A: Why? Afraid they won’t stick around and listen?
W: Maybe. You know, not everyone likes short stories like we do.
A: True, true! But they love us.
W: Well, they love some of the foolishness that comes out of our mouths, but you know I could read a book every other day!
A: Know you could. Just wanting something unusual, you know, some different challenges on my list. If interested, our listeners can go to our Prosecco N Prose Instagram page and you know find my page link in our bio.
W: aka_horner
A: Right! To check out my ultimate challenge. I would love to have anyone who wants to join in to please do so and would love to see what you’re reading … your thoughts … whatever’s on your mind.
W: You did have a few unusual ones. I actually love that I made your challenge, and that I get to pick a book for you this year. Hmmm….
A: ...careful there high speed...although, you haven’t disappointed me yet.
W: Such a great idea to bring in new reads. I’m terrible for getting stuck, not that reading is stuck, but I find an author or genre I love and I read everything I can get my hands on by them.
A: Quickly seeing this with my latest James Patterson novel...The Russian...so good! Takes me back to my investigator days. Patterson has another one I’m getting ready to buy also...it’s called Walk in My Combat Boots: True Stories from America’s Bravest Warriors...nonfiction...teamed up with...ah what’s his name? Retired Ranger Vet First Sergeant...one of the Black Hawk Down guys.
W: Oh...I love military stories. Cheers!
A: Me too...Cheers! But I would just ask that you don’t give me another thriller for a bit. I know that is your genre of choice. Loving them now too, but it’s, you know, time for something different. Who knows...this challenge may help me find some new authors and genres to add to my ever-growing list? Wendy, you should join me in this challenge.
W: Maybe I will … maybe the next one.
A: Oh come on! Still a lot of the year left for this one … but no pressure. So let’s talk about our prosecco … Ménage á Trois.
00:04:22 Prosecco 101 and Tasting
W: Okay. Ménage á Trois is a DOC, 11% alcohol … is about $11 … dry, and our Vivino app rates it a 3.6.
A: Hmmm, not exactly a great rating … but a lot of threesomes in that Ménage á Trois rating...you got your 3...2x3 is six…. So, let’s see.
W: Do we have to go there?
A: Couldn’t resist but carry on!
W: It’s a very light, pale yellow color and lots of bubbles … but not in a steady stream from just a few points on the bottom, they are all over. Very sparkly, this one looks!
A: Definitely lots of fine bubbles, and they sort of linger at the top. I’d say...the color’s a light straw. Sort of like Montana wheat.
W: Oooh! Nice visual! Very citrusy smell … lemon …
A: … and crisp … ah fresh … the label says, Let’s see here ... “This fun-loving sparkler is a fabulously fresh and flirty … Oooh I love the alliteration... fabulously fresh and flirty with alluring floral aromas and crisp citrus flavors.” Not really getting a floral, but if the smell is any indication, it’ll be citrusy. Let me see.
W: Oh yeah … there is definitely citrus there. And some honey, not like the La Vostra, but just a touch of it.
A: It stings the tongue; it’s a little zappy … Now I get your honey, honey...Not heavy at all though. Got the citrus … sort of like an orange, or wait … let me try again … ah! Marmalade. Marmalade.
W: Hmmm … okay, I get more of an apricot and … something else … maybe like a not quite ripe peach, I'm thinking.
A: It really lingers in your mouth. There’s just a bit of a bite to it...again zappy. I’m also getting your apricot now on the finish.
W: So, for me, it has a bit of a like a sticky finish...
A: [Amy chokes on her prosecco]
W: You okay?
A: I’m okay!
W: Okay, the honey ...hmm… you sure?
A: I’m good. Go ahead. I’m sorry.
W: The honey just it kind of it kind of makes me feel thirsty.
A: I have to ask you; did you just say sticky finish? [Amy still trying not to cough]
W: I like the honey; it’s sticky, right?
A: Oh! That’s so you’ll come back for more! [laughing]
W: Anyway! This is my podcast co-host. She does not have…
A: We are drinking Ménage á Trois.
W: We are, but I’m trying to elevate your palate. I definitely will...come back for more!
A: Let’s move on because I finally have my voice back.
W: Okay good so then I’d like to ask you any thoughts on food pairings?
A: Well, I’m not sure yet!
W: Yeah! Because you’re stuck on honey, but go ahead.
A: I might have worked up an appetite! You?
W: Well, I feel, I feel like an appetizer soup … you know like a chowder or lobster bisque … or Oooh prosciutto/melon/fresh mozzarella skewers would be good.
A: Oooh I love those, and you make the best one. But I’m thinking of my baked pimento crabbie bites…I’m so gunna post that recipe. Divine! And you can make and freeze them ahead ... a bit of salty with the sweetness. Oh, and also it would work with that umm Asian salad that I love from Giant … umm those prepackaged ones from Dole or Taylor Farms. Those are my fav!
W: Yum. I like anything that you can make and freeze ahead of time. It all sounds very delicious.
A: I will post those on our Instagram...that recipe. So good!
W: Yeah, for sure. So, their website which is absolutely fabulous, you’ve got to check it out … says it pairs well with a fresh fruit tart.
A: Oh, okay Whole Foods has the best fruit tarts...I get that.
W: Also, from the website … notice the blue dancers on the label?
A: I do see that there are two...Not three!
W: So, the mark of the Twin Dancers is inspired by the infamous Rorschach inkblots.
A: Really?
W: Yes, really. From the website, the founders felt that using abstract dancers in motion, which you interpret in your own way, would communicate the thrilling taste experience, and the alluring, playful personality that’s blended into every sensual sip of Ménage à Trois.
A: I like their thinking. Everyone’s experience with this prosecco, with any prosecco, really, will be unique.
W: It will. Just like everyone’s experience with prose. Oh wow! When you smell it now, it’s got a bit of a peach smell. Do you get that?
A: Oooh...At the pop of the cork, this Ménage à Trois was very citrusy, but you know, as it’s opened, I can smell a bit more floral.
W: I like your little turn of a phrase, and I do get the floral aromas now … adds to the sweetness in the taste, for me.
A: I think a good salty baked pimento crabbie bite or two or three would be a perfect pairing for our bubbly.
W: Next time, for sure. You know, the Ménage à Trois website had a recipe for prosecco gummies and a raspberry limoncello prosecco that looks amazing when it’s finally summer again.
A: Prosecco gummies? That sounds like a great party favor takeaway for our next in-person book club meeting.
W: That would be a fun idea. You’ve got to check out their website, tons of great recipes … and I only looked at the ones for prosecco. Author bio?
00:10:32 Author Bio
A: Definitely checking out that website out. As if I need any more reasons to drink prosecco. I hope there’s enough for me to have three glasses today.
W: Stop!
A: Okay...snapping out of the spell...hey guys if you liked our Ménage à Trois tasting, leave us a review on Apple podcast. We are enjoying the most recent comments.
W: Some great feedback.
A: Now let’s talk about John Chu! Our author was born in Taiwan and moved to the U.S. at age six. He is, get this, a microprocessor architect.
W: I looked that up because I wanted to know what that meant he did.
A: And???
W: I’m pretty sure I don’t really understand, but it is one of the most challenging and interesting jobs in the tech industry … though, to be honest, that was for a microprocessor designer, since I couldn’t find a microprocessor architect.
A: So, are you saying this might not be even correct?
W: I guess I am, but it said, if I may continue,
A: Of course! Sorry!
W: They spend their days solving logic problems that can be reduced to a series of symbols with a pen and paper. And if that’s not true, microprocessor architects, just let me know what you do, do.
A: Gosh. I mean we should’ve just asked Mr. Chu when we were messaging. He was so responsive and helpful. He is also, as this episode attests, a science fiction writer, a literary translator, and fun fact! He’s a podcast narrator.
W: He even read this short story on an episode of Escape Pod: The Original Science Fiction Podcast. If you guys are interested in listening, it is Escape Pod 459: The Water That Falls On You From Nowhere. Amy, you can link it in the show notes?
A: Of course, and you can also find it in the show notes from the previous episode, which would be 18. I always post the short stories ahead of time for our regulars who read ahead or for anyone who just wants to read a great short story.
W: Just love that we can say we have regulars.
A: I know, right? Mr. Chu’s work has been published in the Boston Review, Uncanny, Asimov’s Science Fiction, ... love saying Asimov…
W: I know you do!
A: ... also in Clarkesworld and in Tor.com, which is where we found today’s story.
W: This short won the 2014 Hugo Award for Best Short story. Mr. Chu also translates novels and stories from Chinese to English.
A: He certainly has a full plate! So glad he has time to write great shorts like this. Now I read “How to Piss Off a Failed Super Soldier,” too. One of his character’s is named Aitch...A-I-T-C-H and the other one is Jay, Get it? J.
W: Uh hum!
A: So good. I would say that Science Fiction isn’t a genre I normally gravitate to, but we’ve read some really good ones over this past year.
W: Totally agree. Not exactly my kind of story, usually, either, but I have enjoyed dipping my toes in with some great short stories. This one included. So, let’s get right to it. Tell us about the characters.
00:13:36 Characters Intros
A: We have two main characters. Both appear to be in their early 30s. Matt, our narrator, is ...get this...a biotech engineer!
W: Art imitating life? We know Matt is over 30 because it comes up about marriage and having children.
A: That’s right. And then there’s Gus, his mixed martial artist-personal trainer-dead language reading and speaking boyfriend. His character reads like a total 10 if you’re rating.
W: Oh yeah! I loved all things Gus did. He seemed like a really interesting guy.
A: Any guy into books is our kind of guy; it’s like you're my person...Gus! I heart you!
W: You’re a little spicy today…
A: I think it’s the prosecco.
W: Always blaming the prosecco, let’s get to our summary.
00:14:27 Brief Summary/with spoilers
A: I just want to start by saying that I absolutely loved the illustration for this story by Christopher Silas Neal. It was, again, on Tor.com. The white and blue jagged icy water on that black background was so chilling and so sinister.
W: Like a bad omen or storm ready to hit.
A: Exactly! Then you have this handsome man in red being pelted with said water. If you look closely there is another man...oh so shirtless...diving deep into the water...it tells me that something big is getting ready to go down in this read.
W: I have it right here. I didn’t look that close. You’re so right.
A: You know I can’t help myself, but in my research, I found red is such a positive color in the Chinese culture, so I know a happy ending will more than likely take place for the man in the illustration. I just knew that this was going to be a good short read, and it took me about 40 minutes to get through and about 50 minutes to listen to it on Escape Pod.
W: I did enjoy listening to the author read his story. A little preface from Tor.com … “In the near future water falls from the sky whenever someone lies, either a mist or a torrential flood, depending on the intensity of the lie.
A: This phenomenon has been going on for only a few weeks. The water is not harmful, but oh so freezing cold. However, if you tell something that’s not a lie, but not exactly the truth, the air gets very humid. Now a very, very true statement can actually remove water.
W: Yes, a very interesting phenomenon. Makes me think of the Liar, liar pants on fire saying, but less dangerous.
A: Well, there is the threat of hypothermia with the water, but not the third-degree burns.
W: True. So Matt, our narrator, and Gus have been in a relationship for a while, but Matt has not come out to his traditional Chinese parents, though he does think, in the story, that he should’ve done it a decade ago.
A: Gus’s declaration of love to Matt, and Matt’s decidedly reserved response, prompts Matt to invite Gus home with him for the Christmas holiday. Now, due to the complexities of the Mandarin language, there aren’t actual words for boyfriend or girlfriend, so Matt has been referring to Gus with his family as a word that means sweetheart, lover, or spouse. Not using names isn’t unusual; names are for friends and acquaintances.
W: Right. And there has been a lot of pressure for Matt to find a good Chinese girl, get married, and start a family.
A: So traditional and lots of pressure. But Matt brings Gus to Christmas, and Matt’s sister quickly picks up on the nature of their relationship. Girl is livid. Isn’t she?
W: Yep! Oh she’s, she’s hot!
A: She accuses Matt of trying to kill their parents.
W: Think she needed some water to cool her off a little bit.
A: She did!
W: Not only the parents...embarrassing them in front of her in-laws...remember they came too. She reminds Matt his job, his job! - is to give his parents a grandson … make them happy.
A: Yes, and she proceeds to spend the holiday keeping Matt and their parents apart, or at least not letting Matt be alone with them, to prevent Matt from coming out.
W: But … spoiler … it all comes to head at dinner when the in-laws ask the inevitable marriage question.
A: It’s the lead-up to the grandson question.
W: Of course. Matt decides he’s not hiding any longer and tells the dinner table that Gus has proposed to him. Matt’s sister explodes and kicks him out.
A: But as Gus points out, when he comes to calm Matt down while packing, his parents already knew, remember that?
W: Uh huh!
A: And in a really funny moment, Mom’s big concern is whether Matt and Gus can give her a grandson using both of their genes. Brains and Braun [singing].
W: It was funny. Gus has won over the family, maybe not sister, but Mom seems happy that Matt has someone who can look out for him.
A: Gus and Matt do leave for a motel though, and Matt tells Gus a story that helps explain the strained relationship between him and his sister. Gus leaves to give Matt some time to process, and in the empty room, Matt can finally say, “I love you, Gus.”
W: I wasn’t sure at first how I felt about the ending because I wasn’t sure how the story about Matt’s sister fit exactly.
A: It gives us such insight, but more importantly, it shows the reader that Matt is finally starting to open up.
W: Okay!
A: Shares why it’s been, you know, so hard for him to do so. The ending is incredibly hopeful, and I flipping loved it!
W: Totally agree. Let’s get to our theme.
00:19:25 Themes
A: Truth and lies. Now, like in life, there are some qualifications to the lies. Huge deceit will get someone an icy torrent. White lies or less consequential lies might just get a mist. But there are also the lies we tell to ourselves, which in this short, don’t seem to cause the water to fall.
W: No, it doesn’t. It seems they have to be actually spoken out loud to cause a disturbance in the atmosphere. But it had us thinking about why we lie, to ourselves and to others.
A: Right. The story opens with water falling on Gus. We do not know what lie he has told, or if he is telling a stream of them. A new fad has arisen from this phenomenon...sort of like a frat boy experience...to be able to stay in the falling water as long as possible.
W: Nothing is safe from becoming a fad, especially the more challenging it is to accomplish. Gus is up to a minute now.
A: Hmmm! This was interesting to me because I felt Gus was living the, you know, the more truthful life.
W: Right!
A: I kind of felt like he was, you know, rarely caught under a deluge of water.
W: Same. But Matt is a different story. He is very aware of what he can say or how he can say it to avoid getting wet. And he’s hiding a lot. From Gus, from his family, even from himself, to some degree.
A: He is, but he feels, and I think this would be a common argument, that he’s doing it to protect his family.
W: Totally agree, but often, the lies we tell others end up hurting ourselves more. And Matt does hurt Gus, which really, really hurts Matt. It becomes the breaking point of continuing to hold on to the lie.
A: I think it definitely does. And also, he says the water falling meant he couldn’t lie to his family anymore. So, there’s that. He’s forced to let the truth set him free.
W: You could say that. But Matt has gotten very good at skirting around his lie and not letting it be revealed. I mean even over their holiday, the only person who gets wet is his sister.
A: Good point. It’s when he’s around Gus that Matt has a harder time keeping his true feelings from being known.
W: Right! He loves Gus, but does not want to or seem to be able to say it and yet, when he doesn’t, he’s subjected to the icy water. Even when it’s just him and Gus. I didn’t get why he would stubbornly hang on to the lie.
A: It takes a lot to let go of something you’ve shaped your whole life around. Matt is so much more afraid of what he will lose because he can’t yet see what he will gain.
W: True! Maybe that’s why some people lie. They think they are protecting others. Now this story didn’t have a huge deceit kind of lie … I think of those as pretty self-centered. A lie to protect yourself.
A: No, it really didn’t. I wonder what kind of waterworks those lies would bring. That seems like it would be the very worst kind of lie, so does a rain spout come and just completely wash the person away? You know, like a tsunami?
W: [laughing] Really, Amy? Though that’s actually very insightful … I would’ve expected you to compare it to that carwash experience where you nearly left the sunroof open.
A: What? [insulted] The author said the falling water is based on the intensity of the lie. I think that’s a very deductive statement.
W: Yes, it is, but also a very funny visual. Let’s get to our symbol of water.
00:23:23 Symbols/Motifs
A: Yes. A pretty clear symbol. We will also talk about rain because water that falls is usually, usually, considered rain, and I thought it would be interesting to look at both in relation to this short.
W: Oooh … interesting. So, water is symbolic of cleansing, obviously, and life and freedom. In literature, it is also a symbol of power and, get this, has the ability to free characters as well as claim them.
A: Getting water dumped on you after you lie is quite the visual of a cleansing.
W: And I guess how bad your lie is relative to how much cleansing you need. I was thinking about the water giving the characters the ability to either free them or claim them though.
A: Okay.
W: The water falling freed Matt to non-verbally express his true feelings to Gus, but it also held him kind-of hostage from revealing his truth to his family, specifically his parents.
A: Right! Moving to the rain aspect of it … Rain is usually in conjunction with a storm, which foreshadows something bad or unpleasant or that something is going to occur.
W: Well, you just got caught in a lie. Not the best event happening.
A: Especially when it’s so public. But rain also symbolizes being left out or alone … fun and rebellious … misery … romantic … like I’m willing to stand in the rain for a kiss.
W: Gus kind of did that in the beginning … the fad bit … when Matt was watching him. And just when Matt feels he can’t take it anymore, Gus says “I love you, Matt,” and the water is literally sucked out of the air. Quite a romantic declaration.
A: So romantic. Rain, like the cleansing water, is also symbolic of renewal and rebirth … a good thing coming after a bad time or the washing away of the old and regrowing of something better. After Matt skirts around admitting his own feelings, the water falls on him, and it causes him to invite Gus home for the Christmas holiday. It’s a chance to regrow their relationship into something better.
W: That’s right. And when the sister gets rained on for saying Gus will probably cheat, maybe something good will come from that like actually wanting to see her brother truly happy. Really loved this symbol in this piece. Was just so perfectly fitting.
A: Now our names were also very, very fitting.
00:25:33 Voodoo Name Book/Character Sketch
W: They were. Tell us what you found for Matt.
A: The name Matt is Hebrew meaning gift from God. I’m thinking maybe Matt is the gift to his family that’ll provide a son to carry on the familial name.
W: They definitely wanted him to do that. It was almost all they could talk about in his life. Even when it’s clear Gus is his chosen one, Mom just wants to know if they can make a son with both of their genes.
A: Just a little medical miracle. Matt’s are good at making money, point blank. They let their partners take on the dominant role in the relationship. A Matt takes on challenges and is passionate so their relationships are often intensely emotional.
W: Okay, Matt does seem to be the breadwinner and Gus does take the lead, but Matt didn’t strike me as passionate …
A: Not yet anyway.
W: Maybe he’s on his way after his water cleansing and family announcement. What about Gus?
A: Gus is Latin for worthy of respect. Gus’s are physically well-built men of considerable strength.
W: That’s our Greek god Gus!
A: Exactly! But to contrast this macho image, the name Gus has associations with children. Remember how Matt’s nieces took to Gus?
W: I do. Anything else?
A: A Gus is a very communicative man, great with large groups, happy playing with children, sincere in affections, and faithful to his partner.
W: Hah! Well take that sis! That perfectly describes Gus. Not a name you see often. I love it. Gus was such a great character.
A: He was. He was the true embodiment of his name. Game time?
00:27:23 Game
W: Let’s. I’m excited for this because we had such a fun time last time we played this. Two Facts and a Fib. Because the holiday of Christmas was celebrated in the story, we thought it might be fun to stump each other with some Christmas facts from America and China.
A: And after 15,000 texts back and forth, we’ll see if either of us were clear on the instructions. And hope that we don’t get soaked.
W: Let’s hope not. Maybe it’ll rain prosecco though. But even if we were unclear, it’ll be fun. I’ll go first and I’m going to start with Chinese Christmas traditions.
A: Okay, okay!
W: Okay!
- In China, Christmas is not considered a public holiday and people do not get the day off.
- Chinese Santa plays a saxophone and instead of elves, he is accompanied by several young women, who are his nieces, dressed in red and white.
- People give apples on Christmas Eve because in Chinese the symbols for Christmas Eve means peaceful or quiet evening, which has been translated from the carol “Silent Night.” The word for apple in Mandarin sounds like the word peace.
A: Maybe we still weren’t clear as I did mine a bit differently. I weaved our characters in for fun.
W: I don’t think it matters as long as it's fun and that never seems to be in short supply. Now guess!
A: Okay, okay! These all seem like they could be true. Nothing overly outlandish. So I’m looking for the fib, right?
W: Right … and no water fell to give you a hint.
A: No, unfortunately. I’m thinking that Chinese Santa is not a big a saxophone player and that Chinese Christmas isn’t that big of a holiday, given the Chinese New Year … so I’m going to go with #2.
W: Well, actually you are correct, but not completely. I can’t believe we didn’t turn this into a drinking game. That is the fib, but Chinese Santa does play saxophone, and rather than elves, he does have women with him, but they are his sisters.
A: Interesting fib…. hmmmmm….so you know I am the queen of inappropriate so get ready.
W: I know this.
A: I’m also going to start with the Chinese traditions. So, I want to quiz your knowledge on gifts to avoid giving anyone in your life who may be of the Chinese culture, and like I said, I weaved our characters into the game. While doing this research, I also realized that I had likely totally offended one of my prior students I was training when I was teaching him to be an investigator.
W: Was he Chinese?
A: Yes. Oh my gosh! I’m so MOR-TI-FIED…but enough on that ...Here’s my two facts and a fib….
- It was not a nice gift for Matt to give his sister an expensive set of Henkel’s knives for Christmas.
- Gus’ gift to Kevin...a warm green hat was such a sentimental gift that it would be worn with pride.
- Kevin’s giving Matt a nice bottle of cognac would have been so appropriate for this story.
W: I like how you just skipped over what you did to offend your investigator, but those all seem like perfectly acceptable gifts. Hmmm … Okay, uhm, I’m going to go with the knives because I’m afraid Matt’s sister might put one in his back, which is not a good use for the gift.
A: Nope...you are incorrect...The first one is true as you are not to give sharp objects such as knives and scissors as gifts. You are telling the receiver of that gift that you want to sever ties with him or her. Matt would never want to do that to his sister, right?
W: Maybe and… you are good. Totally missed the word “not.” Which means I kind of technically got it correct because I said it wasn’t a good gift.
A: But technically you got it wrong, because it’s the power of details, my friend.
W: You are so right. So, which is the fib?
A: The last one is also true as it is very nice to give an item of luxury such as an expensive bottle of cognac or whiskey…
W: I’ll take an item of luxury.
A: ... or even prosecco to someone romantic or someone close to the family. And Gus is almost family according to Matt…Number Two was the fib. Now listen to this...If Gus gave Kevin a green hat, Gus is telling Kevin that his wife, who is Matt’s sister, is cheating on Kevin.
W: Wow! Okay. A green hat is bad news then. Does the military know this? Green hats are handed out like candy during basic training issue. Gives new meaning to some of those cadences. Never knew that.
A: Now remember, Wendy, I was talking Chinese culture, not American.
W: Oh yes, it’s the details, you said. You are correct. Now for some American Christmas traditions …
- During World War I, American and British intelligence agencies worked with a playing card company to make a very special deck of cards that were given out at Christmas. They helped allied prisoners of war escape. Individual cards peeled apart when they got wet to reveal maps of escape routes.
- Mistletoe might be about getting a romantic kiss from your sweetheart, but the Germanic word for mistletoe literally means “dung on a twig.”
- Hold your applause. Three, “Jingle Bells” was originally a Thanksgiving song. It was titled “One Horse Open Sleigh and written for a church’s Thanksgiving concert.
A: Interesting. I see I’m slowly bringing you over to the dark side. Look at you coming out with a poop joke.
W: Well, we become what we are around. Your force must be stronger than mine.
A: [laughing] You’re literally trying to stump me at my own game, so I’m going to say #2...dung on a twig...is a fib. I cannot imagine that the romantic mistletoe would ever be considered in such a vile way.
W: Well! I’m sorry, but #2 is true.
A: Ahhh … you ruined that for me. I’ll never kiss Josh under dung on a twig again. I’ll just kiss Rufino instead.
W: Getting tickets to that. So, animals eat the mistletoe berries, digest the seeds, and the droppings grow into new plants. The fib is the first one. It was World War II. Details. Details, Amy. The playing cards were to help POWs escape German concentration camps.
A: You know I am surprised I didn’t know that as I love WWI and II history. Okay so my turn...American Christmas traditions...
- In Great Falls, MT…you know in my hometown, it’s tradition to have a massive yearly Christmas tree in the center of town made out of tumbleweeds, encased in chicken wire, coated in a flame-retardant substance, and illuminated with colorful lights.
W: It would be!
A:
- Another Christmas tradition would be to drive a couple hours southwest to Bozeman, MT to the annual Bozeman Ice Festival to climb Hyalite Canyon, a frozen waterfall of luxurious ice.
- Moving to your parts…over yonder to Medora, North Dakota where you can celebrate an Old-Fashioned Cowboy Christmas drinking hot whiskey nog and partying with your friends all the while wearing a 10-gallon hat rather than a typical Santa cap. Yeehaw!
W: All those all sound equally ridiculous … which means absolutely nothing coming from you …
A: Right ...because the power is in the details.
W: Yes … which is why I’m going with #3. I've been to Medora and the 10-gallon hat is not typical there, ever. That’s more of a Texas thing.
A: Well, my friend. Then you’ve not been home in a while as there is a website that speaks of said celebration and those 10-gallon hats.
W: I’m, I’m speechless. I’ve got nothing. What is the fib?
A: Okay so the Bozeman and Medora traditions are true, but you’re going to have to leave Great Falls, MT and head south to Chandler, AZ to see your tumbleweed Christmas tree. They’ve been erecting this tree since the 50s, and it was said that it takes about 1000 bushes to make the tree. In your parts and mine, the tumbleweeds are only seen blowing across the highway in between prairies…or you know in a tossed salad.
00:36:19 Random
W: I did wonder about that one, but it sounded so specific and ridiculous, I figured it must be true. I do love when we get to learn new stuff, which brings us to our random. Now this was not our idea. We got it from the Escape Pod 459 episode where John Chu read his story, and we found it very intriguing.
A: And Yes … the story of none other but the Italian stallion Pinocchio. And oh so appropriate.
W: I have no idea where this is going and I’m scared.
A: Well, I have a song. [singing and snapping] Pinoc...Pinoc...Pinocchio. You’ll find him if you have to go to Tokyo. Come out, come out, wherever you are. Pinoc, Pinoc, Pinocchio. Have you ever heard that before?
W: No. I have no words for that. Do you mind if I move onto what…
A: The look on your face is flipping priceless.
W: I-I-I-I don’t really know how to approach, so I’m just going to go...can I just continue on with my discussion.
A: Sure, go ahead! [laughing]
W: So...so Alasdair Stuart, the host of the episode, talked briefly about Pinocchio being an original coming out story…
A: Song!
W: I’m actually thinking about your song. I can’t stop thinking about it. It was just such a new way to think about the story, but with this and your song, it made complete sense.
A: Now Mr. Stuart … I can’t stop thinking about my song either.
W: I know but you sounded really good!
A: But Mr. Stuart talked about Pinocchio wanting to be a real boy and Geppetto wanting to change him …
W: Right.
A: Not accepting that Pinocchio is a puppet. It was a very interesting parallel. I thought of Matt’s sister. She struggled the most to accept Matt, though, she spun the narrative to it being her parents who would have had the problem.
W: She did. But Matt struggled as well, like Pinocchio. He wanted to be accepted and loved, but didn’t know how to make it happen until it just did. Which doesn’t solve all the problems, in real life.
A: Right! Pinocchio is a fairytale, so it just looks like Pinocchio being made into a real boy solves everything. I think we need a sequel to Pinocchio. Maybe you could write that up, Wendy and I could sing the song.
W: I would say that is a great idea. I’m worried about the song, and I love sequels. But for us, we are going to not go into a sequel here. Okay.
00:39:03 Wrap It Up
A: Not enough prosecco.
W: No definitely not. But I do think we have just enough time to find out what you did that was so offensive to your investigator. Dying to know.
A: Oh, come on! We were going to cut this one short because it is a short. Long story short...just figured this out after doing all this research on gift giving in the Chinese culture.
W: Research is important.
A: Uh hum! So, I was training an older gentleman to be an investigator. I had to do the training at his home. It was a requirement for his job. His wife was not overly comfortable with me being in his basement office all day alone with him or driving around in the same car….so I tried to smooth the situation. She was so lovely. Couldn’t figure out why it was such a big deal.
W: Okay. But it makes sense, her discomfort, not that you are some husband stealer. So, what did you do?
A: So, the second week in... still feeling uncomfortable...I went to Wegmans...I love Wegmans Grocery Store...Purchased four cinnamon rolls that were wrapped in this beautiful white paper box and a small bouquet of pretty flowers. In the Chinese culture, I found out that you do not give anything in fours. It’s a bad omen. and you do not give flowers as a gift as this is wishing someone on the way to his or her funeral. Truth!
W: What? I would have taken some cinnamon rolls. I’m not going to lie.
A: But that’s not all either…
W: What there’s more?
A: I did not offer her these gifts with two hands. Not appropriate. I remember this specifically as I had the box of cinnamon rolls in a bag on my arm. I was trying to balance them, and I handed her the flowers with one hand...she said no to me…and I insisted...
W: Of course, you did!
A: So, there was kind of a weird look between her and her husband. Ohhhhh! I was like ohhhhhhhhh, I’m such a bad investigator. And I also found out that I’m a bad culture catcher.
W: Wow. You knocked the bad vibes right out of the park.
A: It was not a home run hit kind of day. I truly though, at the time, had no idea. No wonder I never heard from him again after I gave him his final check ride, you know his final exam. Come to think of it, he is actually the only investigator I don’t keep in contact with.
W: That’s probably on purpose. But that’s awful … but you didn’t know. You were trying to help the situation, not make it so much more worse. Wow.
A: Yeah … I’m just so sorry to have committed so many bad cultural offenses all in like five minutes.
W: Well … I guess you can take your new knowledge forward.
A: I certainly can.
W: And on that note … we’d love to know what you guys thought, about Amy’s story or anything else discussed today, and to have you join us for our season finale … The Invisible Life of Addie Larue by V. E. Schwab.
A: Such an amazing story! Ciao!
W: Ciao!
